Monday, 18 March 2013

An Update and Quick Hello

Hi I am the Awkward Girl.

I honestly have no idea how many people will read this but it really doesn't matter. 
I'm creating this Blog so people can have a laugh at my mistakes and hopefully someone may learn from them.

First off a bit about myself, I am 21 and live in Australia. 

This is me... Hi!!

I am a recovered alcoholic
I'm a malti replaced guy-oholic 
I suffer from Depression, Anxiety, Anorexia,sometimes  Bulimia, Paranoia, and Extreme Shyness, I'm also Dyslexic. and I'm Single

We will talk about those things later.

I wanted to be the Awkward girl because i tend to end up doing things that later make me cringe, it doesn't matter if it's in sex or if its talking to friends or even teachers.

Half the time i don't mean to do it, life just happens around me.
for example, i haven't had a period free birthday since i was 14 (when i first got it)
Or every guy i have ever had sex with has an embarrassing story to go with it. (I will get to that later too, you should stay tuned because the guy i hooked up with on Saturday is a good one)

Doesn't matter if I'm walking into walls in the cool kid area or hillbillys  are chasing me with spit flowers i have a story for all kinds of things.

And it wouldn't be much of a guide if i didn't give out some advise.

  •  If you get drugged in a bar DO NOT walk into a ally to be sick when the bouncer kicks you out, even if your with your friends. There are balloon gas bottles back there and they will fall on your foot.

  • If you get drugged when your out with your boyfriend give him more than 10 seconds warning before you take a nap on the street.
  • If you Smoke Kronic don't do the whole bag alone after you take your friends anti-depressants and have 4 shots. crazy shit will go down. (I will elaborate in a later post)
  • Just because he's a male model with a massive penis doesn't mean hes good in bed(I will elaborate in my next post)
  • And two of the best pieces of advice i have ever had (1) from my sister "your belly should never be bigger than your boobs" and (2) from a gay guy i worked with in a salon. "always get the biggest size coffee, it makes you look cuter "
So i hope you enjoyed my first post. stay tuned for my funny sexual experiences.